


Narcohypnia

by kat8cha



Category: Marvel, Marvel Avengers Movies Universe
Genre: Drunk Sex, M/M, Morning After
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-26
Updated: 2011-10-26
Packaged: 2017-10-24 23:50:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/269291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kat8cha/pseuds/kat8cha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for this prompt: Just like it says. Tony and Clint sass at each other constantly at some big gala or party, tumble drunkenly into bed and have wild animal sex, then wake up red-faced the next morning. @ the marvel movie kink meme</p>
            </blockquote>





	Narcohypnia

Tony Stark did not get hangovers.

He suffered from the occasional brief break in drinking that caused, of course, a mild (throbbing, painful, horrible) headache that was cured by either some ungodly but extremely restorative energy drink or, if he had nothing to do that day, some more alcohol.

That being said, the morning (it was before noon, thus it was morning, if only barely) next to Clint Barton Tony was suffering from a mild (horrific) headache, a dry mouth that tasted faintly of fake grape, and the vague sensation that his eyes were being scoured from the inside out.

Barton was still asleep and, after Tony checked under the covers to be sure, naked, as well as covered in a variety of the usual marks of love-making. Seeing as these factors generally equaled a one night stand Tony decided to head down to the lab. He never stuck around for that inevitable awkward morning after conversation if possible and hopefully Barton would be so shamefaced he'd gather up his clothes and flee. It wasn't like Tony was uncomfortable with his own sexuality or others finding out about it, after all the tabloids had regularly covered his occasional gay lover, he just didn't feel like admitting he'd slept with Barton of all people.

The man was full of himself.

"Ah." Tony said as he grabbed a virulently colored but sadly non-alcoholic beverage from his well-stocked fridge.

Full of himself.

Right.

 _"When you're a handsome, brilliant, witty, billionaire," Tony stopped to sip at his whisky and smile at a passing debutante, which earned him a full faced flush and a giggle, before he continued his retort, "it's not called being full of yourself." Tony Stark wasn't the kind of guy who smiled, not a full on smile, not even for the paparazzi. He had the occasional smirk or small smile that was touched up in editorial so it looked like it reached his eyes, but he didn't grin. He turned one of those small smiles on Barton now, though this one did reach his eyes. "It's called well deserved self-confidence."_

 _Barton was leaning against one of the many pillars that filled the hall the gala was being held in. Tony had been surprised when he'd run into Barton at the party. He'd accused the man of stalking him, of course, because that was apparently what SHIELD agents did on company time (it was) but Barton apparently _knew_ Maria Gènnóise. 'Old Girlfriend', which meant nothing because Maria Gènnóise could have been half the county's old girlfriend but their relationship must have meant something to Maria because she had invited Clint despite the man's lack of social standing. It was the first time Tony had ever seen Barton really off duty and it was fun baiting him with no disapproving Coulson, Fury, or Rogers hanging around._

"When you have the money to buy a newspaper off when they call you full of yourself, sure it is." Barton motioned to the bartender to give him another drink, Tony preformed the always understood and silent motion for 'me too, and give him a double'. "But c'mon, Stark, I know when a guy is full of himself," the smirk on Barton's face was self-deprecating, "and if you're not full of yourself you're full of _something_."

Full of _it_ went unspoken. Full of hot air could be applicable also.

"Well, if I'm going to be full of something." And Tony shifted from the seat across from Barton he had been sitting on to the seat right next to Barton, then he bumped his elbow companionably with the near-tipsy Avenger and took both their drinks from the suddenly no doubt blind as well as deaf as long as they tipped well, bartender. "How about if I'm full of you."

Tony winced and it wasn't from the spiking pain at the back of his head that felt like the Black Widow was stabbing him with an ice pick. Not one of his best pick-up lines, he could admit. He may have been well on his way to cheerfully drunk at that point, which was alright because Barton himself had been only two drinks away from being extremely handsy. Tony downed half of his restorative in one go and then kept going for the lab. He was sure he could find security footage of the night before, he had installed the cameras in his place more so that he would have proof should anything like Obidiah Stane breaking into his house and attempting to kill him should happen again than to have the ability to make a 'best one night stand's' reel, but the cameras could multi-purpose just as well as their boss.

 _Barton pushed him up against the wall and rucked up a shirt that cost more than Barton's whole outfit twice over. There were torn buttons on the hard wood floor of the foyer (Barton's) and a rumpled suit jacket tossed over the coffee table (Tony's) and a belt was tossed out of sight of the camera into the living room._

Tony sat back and took a drink as he watched the casual destruction of his living room caused by garments flung haphazardly. He had thought that Barton was a marksman… although, that was probably why Barton's tosses usually ended up with the clothes lying on things while Tony's ended up with the clothes barely two feet away from whatever spot on the wall he and Barton had stopped to neck at. They reached the bed chamber and Tony switched cameras.

 _Tony pushed Barton onto the large bed which bounced under the man. They were down to socks, boxers and briefs at this point (boxers for Tony, briefs in an obnoxious red for Barton). Barton bent forward to strip off his socks and Tony stepped towards the end of the bed and caught Barton by the sides of his head in a rough kiss. They both tumbled back onto the bed now with Tony on top, although that didn't hold for long, they wrestled briefly, teetered on the edge of the bed for a second before Barton rolled back over into the middle and let Tony take charge._

 _It helped that Tony whipped out some fuzzy pink handcuffs at that point._

 _"Kinky, Stark, don't get enough iron in your regular night life?" Barton didn't protest the click of the cuffs and didn't even test out their grip. Since they were the cheap kind you bought at a novelty store no doubt the trained espionage agent could have broken them like tin foil._

 _"Don't you get enough shafts?" Tony reached into his bedside table of wonders and pulled out a roll of condoms, he ripped one open with his teeth and spread it over Barton's dick._

Tony rubbed his tongue across his teeth. He'd completely forgotten that he had grape flavored condoms.

Note to self, awful flavor, get rid of them.

 _Barton laughed and then gasped when Tony started sucking. It was a sloppy blowjob but Barton didn't seem to mind, that no doubt helped by the fact that both of them were too drunk to care although it should be noted not too drunk to get it up. Barton twisted and pushed and rocked just enough and Tony sucked until he decided he was done because his jaw was aching and sucking cock could get boring pretty quick and broke out the lube._

Tony leaned back in his swivel chair and whistled. Barton was pretty flexible. Come to think of it, Romanoff had been pretty flexible too, though he'd never gotten her in bed. Did SHIELD train flexibility? Was there a special SHIELD sex agent core? Huh. He wouldn't put it past Fury to have his agents use sex to get ahead.

He'd ask Clint later. Or maybe Coulson. Oh yeah, definitely Coulson…

\--

Clint pressed his face into a luxuriously soft pillow to stifle his scream. He'd had sex with Tony Stark last night.

He was never living this down.

And he owed Natasha 50 bucks.


End file.
